badbastion: (default)
badbastion ([personal profile] badbastion) wrote2016-03-22 01:23 am

moody update thingy

Hello friends!

It has been a loooong time since I've posted to LJ. I hope none of you have worried; I've gotten two emails asking about me, and I'm okay! I'm alive and healthy. My boyfriend and cats are alive and healthy. I don't have any art or fics to post - I have two commissions, but they're Destiel, and one is private, and I'm not sure if I want to share those with the general viewing public.

My only problem is my depression. It seems like, no matter what meds I'm on, the depression will. not. go. away. It's frustrating as hell. I'm on Prozac now instead of... something, I can't remember what they took me off of last... but it's killing me. I don't want to draw, I don't want to write, I don't want to do anything but sleep. I've been sleeping 12-14 hours a day, which I hate, but that's the only thing I can do right now. I have an appointment with my meds doc in 2 weeks, but I don't want to switch meds, because I'm afraid things will get even worse :/

I'm seriously behind on commissions and auction works, but I do plan on getting those done relatively soon.

Sooo yeah, I'm alive. But struggling. I haven't been on LJ much lately, haven't really had the time to spend here. How are you guys doing? Have I missed anything important?

[identity profile] milly-gal.livejournal.com 2016-03-22 08:21 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs you super tight* Miss you honey! Hey, look, the depression could just be going in spirals at the moment, remember the wheel's always turning honey! ♥

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs you back* I miss you too Milly! <3

[identity profile] milly-gal.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
*smooches* ♥

[identity profile] amberdreams.livejournal.com 2016-03-22 09:01 am (UTC)(link)
Damn, it sounds horrible, but maybe it is worth sticking with the Prozac if it gets you through to the other side of this slough of despond. I'm glad everything else is going well, that's got to help.

(((hugs)))

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I'm going to stick with it a while longer to see if it will really kick in soon. Thanks!

*hugsss*

[identity profile] amberdreams.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 10:09 am (UTC)(link)
(((hugs ya back)))

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
Awww, that is adorable! I love you too <3

[identity profile] blackrabbit42.livejournal.com 2016-03-22 12:41 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so glad you checked in, you are definitely missed.

That's so frustrating about your meds/depression. It's so tempting to wish for a crystal ball that could tell you all the answers, but as my beloved boss says- wish in one hand and shit in the other, see which one gets full first. So instead, I'll just say that I'm here to listen and walk beside you while you're searching for answers.

((((((((hugs))))))))))

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! *hugs you back*

Yeah, it is frustrating. I miss being manic, lol, but I'm not about to go off my meds just because I've been depressed for longer than usual.

[identity profile] blackrabbit42.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 02:22 pm (UTC)(link)
That is so smart. I know a lot of people who go up and down struggle with that kind of self awareness. Keep holding on honey.

[identity profile] blythechild.livejournal.com 2016-03-22 02:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I was on the meds carousel for years, so I hear your frustration and feel for you. There's nothing quick about evening this stuff out and I won't suggest to you that there is, but hang in there because if you do, things will turn around eventually.

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I've been on it for 5-6 years now. It's frustratingggg. But I am hanging in there, thank you! <3

[identity profile] dizzojay.livejournal.com 2016-03-22 08:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Sorry to read that you've been struggling. Sending positive thoughts your way x

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs* Thanks for the positive thoughts! <3

[identity profile] raindropreverie.livejournal.com 2016-03-23 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
Meds are such a difficult thing to get right with the way the make them to try and work for as many people as possible but every person's body reacts differently. I've got a friend who's done well on Lamictal but I understand hesitation for if changes make things worse. Hopefully they will figure out the best thing for you soon! I've barely been on LJ myself, just too busy/anxious. -hugs-

[identity profile] badbastion.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs back* Thank you! Yeah, I was on Lamictal for awhile, but we ended up changing my meds and I switched from that to something else, and I don't remember what it was. I don't know what I'll end up with, but I'm going to stick with Prozac for awhile and see if it gets any better.

[identity profile] raindropreverie.livejournal.com 2016-04-18 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Sorry for the lag, my attention/mind has been on the fritz. I hope things are doing better for you?

[identity profile] sophiap.livejournal.com 2016-03-24 03:01 pm (UTC)(link)
(hugs)

I'm glad to see your pixels again.

[identity profile] bundamba.livejournal.com 2016-03-26 04:11 pm (UTC)(link)
You know life is hard, and can get you down. But I am so glad I know you and that you are around. I may not talk to you very often but I think of you often.
I wish I could wave a wand and make your life perfect but it's not possible, having said that I hope that you know that I am always around to lend an ear if you need it! Keep chugging on, things can only go up from rock bottom. <3
ext_210326: (moonbridge)

[identity profile] cptnsuz.livejournal.com 2016-03-27 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
*e-hugs*